Now or Next Year?

It can be an unpredictable time in the mediation calendar right now. As organisations gear up for various leave requests and parties and end-of-year reflections, they make a decision – whether conscious or subconscious… To address an issue between team members before the Christmas season or wait until the New Year.

I can see the dilemma because it is a busy and often chaotic time of year. It takes a bit of organisation and time to find the right person to manage the conflict resolution process. So, it could seem like there is just no capacity to deal with it in this season.

From my experience, however, when someone is finding it tough to interact with another person – or group of individuals – at work, delay in resolving the issue takes up a lot of their mental capacity and will impact the situation negatively in other ways too.

Thankfully, I am glad to see the blocked out mediation days in my diary being filled by organisations who are choosing to tackle the situation proactively NOW. Why am I so opposed to delay?

Delay is NOT a friend of conflict resolution.

Though time may help cool emotions down after an argument or series of difficult interactions, too much time will often aid in embedding beliefs about what happened and assumptions about intentions.

Delay will often allow time for those at the core of the situation to speak with others about it. Some of whom may offer wise counsel, but we know that when most people go home and tell their family or friends about what happened, they are likely to be offered biased advice and support. Any initial feelings of being treated 'unfairly' will be magnified.

And any part that individual may have played in the breakdown in communication or trust is likely to be brushed over or justified by well-meaning loved ones.

The inevitable consequence of this is that the individual is less likely to be open to alternative perspectives to the one they feel more certain about over the time that has elapsed.

Delay is NOT a supporter of wellbeing.

People’s feelings and thoughts are not put on pause when away from work. Although for those slightly outside of the core concerns, they can put it to one side while on holiday or ‘away from my desk’, for those in the middle of it, there is no reprieve.

Conflict in the workplace is a key contributor to elevated feelings of anxiety. For those who already experience poor mental health, difficult relationships at work will likely aggravate their symptoms further. It is a rare situation for me to hold a workplace mediation without one or more off the participants mentioning the negative impact the situation has had on their sleep or level of stress.

When I am first brought in to mediate, as soon as the participants are aware of the mediation opportunity, they are keen to book a date as soon as possible. They can feel like they are waiting in anticipation for something to bring closure to the situation.

Delay does NOT foster productivity.

While individuals are finding it difficult to interact positively, this has a natural impact on the smooth running of an organisation. Other people end up being the ‘go-between’ or communication is diverted. If the individuals typically work together, they may:

a)      Have to keep working together but with strained communication and the potential for escalating the conflict

b)     Be separated, so others have to take up additional responsibilities

c)      Avoid each other intentionally – meaning that some necessary communication is also avoided, and levels of productivity is affected

When people are finding the strain of the situation too much to be in the middle of, they may feel unable to work under normal conditions – and so choose to work from a different location or avoid being at certain meetings. Or they may be signed off under the stress of what has been going on.

Projects may be delayed, processes may be re-structured, and other team members will feel the effects of the change in atmosphere and processes.

All in all, delay in conflict resolution can be disruptive in terms of productivity, wellbeing and the level of intervention required to resolve the conflict.

I am pleased that this year, Mosaic Mediation have been receiving similar levels of enquiries and the decision to delay was not made by these clients. Perhaps, being able to outsource the mediation, made the decision a little easier. A the mediator resolving the situation and not needing to unravel the consequences of delay, I am very grateful that they decided to tackle the situation proactively and seek conflict resolution without delay.

Emma Jenkings is an experienced and accredited workplace mediator, speaker, communication skills trainer, a trained DISC practitioner and conflict coach. Mosaic Mediation offers conflict resolution services to prevent, manage and resolve conflict including: training, e-learning, DISC profiles and workshops, assertiveness coaching, executive coaching, small business mediation and workplace mediation, and advisory services on fostering peaceful relationships in the workplace. To find out more about the different services available, CLICK HERE.